Sara's Tale (Chapter 5) No More Flowers

June 29, 2016

 (Circa 2010)

 

It seemed like the sun wanted to almost run out of the sky. Almost like the sun even wanted to know what Old Man Baboo had to say. With the sun setting, I started making my way towards the house to cook Master’s dinner. As I got closer to the Big House, I noticed something, Master never called for me. Usually he calls for me everyday, as soon as the sun sets on the on the fields, but today he never called. I stood still for a minute, the smell of boiling potatoes filling my nose. Was there someone already cooking? 

I began to run up to the house, the closer I got to the house the stronger the aroma became. It smelled just like my own cooking, like a blend of spices, only I would use. I froze again as I stood in front of the steps of the Big House. The person I have shared a my recipes with was… “Sarah!” shouted Mistress as she interrupted my thought. “What are you doing just standing there?” I looked up at her, she had that same look on her face, the look the day they took away Jim Paul. An eerie smile, with a raised eyebrow, her arms sitting upon her wide hips. I knew that nothing good would come from this talk. “I was coming to cook, like I do every night.” She looked up at the sky and shook her head, “Didn’t you hear? Annabelle gonna be cooking the meals now, Sarah. Master just thought it would be better if you stayed in the field and took of the children out there in the camp, you work so well with them, they listen to you, We just gonna keep Annabelle here in the house, she is such a good worker, we just love having here around.” In my mind, I had died. With each word she said a tiny dagger was slicing through my chest, each trying to get to my heart. She wanted me to be miserable. She took away Jim Paul and now Annabelle. Her plan was to destroy my heart, and her plan was working. I feel to my knees, holding back my tears and just looked up at her, “Mistress…” I paused to catch my breath, my heart was beating so fast and my eyes were swollen with sorrow but I didn’t want her to see. “Can I see her, can I just see my Annabelle, I just want to know she is okay, I just..just want to see my little girl…” A tear feel from my eye. She turned her back to me. “Don’t worry about her Sarah, she is fine, and she don’t have time, she is very busy now that she is tending the house and cooking the meals too, just go back to the field, where you belong, she will be just fine in the house with me, I promise to take care of your little girl.” I sat there on my knees, tears flowing down my face, in silence, falling apart, as she ascended the stairs back into the house and calling for her boys to come in the house to eat. I knew my tears meant nothing to her, I just wished Annabelle could have heard them hitting the dirt as they fell from my face. I could barely walk, I headed back to the camp staggering, trying to keep from falling to the ground, my eyes blinded by my tears and my head was pounding. My stomach empty and rumbling, I was a wreck. As I reached my shack I lay in the doorway, just crying, looking up to God waiting for him to give me an answer, or just take me away. Either way I would have been happy, I just wanted to stop crying but I couldn’t. 

I felt a hand on my shoulder, “Git up honey, Its time.” I looked up and wiped the tears from my eyes to see Henny standing there handing me a rag to wipe my face. She helped me off the ground and dusted me off. I knew what she wanted me to do, and at with my current state I was willing to do anything that will help me to know if I would ever see Annabelle again. We snuck off the camp and headed to the darkest corner of the plantation. A weird smell filled the air as we grew closer to our destination. We stood there in front of the old shack. “Dis as far as I go honey, you gots to do dis part by yaself.” Henny said as she let go of my hand. “No Henny, don’t leave me, I cant, I cant…” “Shhhh,” She interrupted. “You can do dis…. Think about what is at steak here, yo lil girl is up dere, aint you worried bout her? Go… go and see.” I looked at the shack, letting go of her hand, I stood up straight, took a deep breath and began to move toward the door. Suddenly a soft wind began to blow and the door of the shack crept open. I looked back to Henny only to see she was gone. I was on my own now. I walked through the door of the shack only to see darkness, I turned to go back and the shack door slammed. There was no turning back. A match struck and a dim flame lit the whole shack. Soon the sound of a wild flame spreading took over the room, I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, the room was fully lit with candles all over, and Old man Baboo stood in front of me, He reached out his hand to me, I looked at him, I reached out my hand to him. The knife that he used to cut master came down, almost floating from a shelf above the mat where he slept. It softly grazed my hand, without him even touch the knife. Soon I felt a prick, I looked down to see my hand was bleeding. I began to panic, and Baboo grabbed my hand, I tried to pull away and he wouldn’t let go, “Shhhh” he looked as me sternly, and shook his head. I was deeper than I wanted to be in what was going on, but at this point there was no return. He squeezed my hand over a bowl, to allow to the blood to flow. He took a bottle of what looked like it had lightening trapped inside in and poured it on the blood and the blood turned white and began to glow, he pointed in the mixture and put his hand in it. I did the same. I closed my eyes and it began. 

It felt like I was floating, off the group and in the air, moving swiftly around in nothingness, just floating. I opened my eyes, I was in a field. The sun shined down on me with such a warmth that I had no choice but to sigh in relief. I felt no pain, I felt so loose. I looked down at my dress, It was beautiful, clean, and fit me graciously. The field that I stood in was filled with flowers the same color as my dress, a sun kissed white that glowed in the daylight. I began to run through the field of flowers, faster and faster, almost fast enough to fly. I had ran to the top of a hill, only to look down and see a glistening pond. I stood there taking it all, and I felt a pair of arms rap around me. They grabbed my waist and pulled my body close. The strangest part about it was I didn’t feel threatened, I felt safe. The arms felt so familiar. I slow turned around, and couldn’t believe my eyes. “You look so beautiful my queen.” he said, “Jim Paul, is that you?” I said hoping that he would give me the answer I so desired. “Who else would I be?” he laughed. I could have melted there in his arms. “I miss you so much” I said before I began to cry. “Don’t cry, my queen. I am happy here where I am. This beautiful land that you see is now my home. Here I can do as I please, no one to beat me, lie on me, accuse me, or hurt me. And soon this will be you home too, and you too will be…. free.” His words entered my heart and sent an unexplained feeling through my whole body, I just knew it felt so good. “I looked at him, I there was so much I wanted to tell him, I wanted him to know what was going on, So I began “Annabelle is…” “I know,” he interrupted. “I see everything from there.” he pointed down the lake, and lake began to glow. “Its beautiful” I said looking down, “Just like you,” he said as grabbed my hand and began to walk me down the hill. Once we got to the bottom of the hill we stood in front of the pond, he turned to me, “Sarah, you have done the best you can to raise our Annabelle, She is shaping into a young queen. Her path will be made by the lessons you have instilled in her. Even though right now, the road isn’t clear, you will soon reap the benefits of your labor my love. I cant promise you that everything will be alright, but I can promise you that we will be reunited, and when we are, it will be like this, just as you see it here, and now. Then we will be together in our truth. Together, forever.” He knelt down by the pond and stuck his hand in the water. I knelt down and did the same. I closed my eyes and reached in. I began to float, off the group and in the air, moving swiftly around in nothingness, just floating. I opened my eyes again, and I was in my shack, on the mat which I slept. I jumped up, and ran to the doorway, to see the camp lit up with the moon’s light. No more flowers, no Jim Paul. I looked down to see the scar of my cut hand. I wasn’t in that beautiful place anymore. I was back on the Plantation. No more flowers in the field, the only flower I knew was now growing in the Big House, where I could never go again. 

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